After writing yesterday's post about it being an "off-day," I felt the need to clarify something. I realized that I could come off as a seriously neurotic and controlling or perfectionistic mother. I have a four-year-old and a two-year-old. I know I don't need to be doing homeschool yet. And trust me, we have had plenty of truer "off-days" than the one I described yesterday.
We have had days (particularly sick days) when we haven't done a thing, days when we DID watch TV all day long and I didn't lift a finger to do any chores or encourage any learning at all. For me, those same days turn out to be the days when I feel the most anxiety. Those are the days that I am least patient and loving with my girls. Those are the days that my children argue more and listen less. And those are the days when I come away feeling absolutely awful about myself. I try REALLY hard to avoid days like that, but less because I'm concerned about living out some idealistic life and more because I just can't stand the way I or our home feels at the end of it.
Again, for the sake of clarity, why do I homeschool my four-year-old instead of waiting until a more "normal" age? Because my personality is such that if we weren't officially homeschooling, I would still be looking for intentional activities to do with the girls; things to keep us occupied and busy and make me feel productive; things that allowed us to work together and interact and draw closer in our relationships. So, for me, it just makes sense to let those activities be school centered. Why not, when I'm going to be putting forth all this effort anyway?
The key is that we don't keep pursuing any course that is adding stress or straining our relationship. It requires a sort of nonchalance about what we do and when and how. I keep general goals in mind and then use all my creative and persuasive powers to make it desirable and fun. If I really badly want to read a chapter of The Secret Garden, but no matter what I say R isn't interested, I drop it. If we are working on handwriting and I feel myself losing patience, I take a step back and change my approach, or else bag it altogether for the day. There are no requirements here, no necessary bench-marks. Everything we do is extra!
I think this is great and totally fits with your family and girls. I could never be so organized or motivated (and Evie is wiggly and distracted!). My temperament requires I get us out of the house when I'm not working/in school and being in work/school/preschool routine most days works great for us. I don't think you are extreme or perfectionistic at all, I think you've just found what works for your family and that's great.
ReplyDeleteI am kind of the same way, where I feel like life is chaotic if I don't try to have some structure or some time where we sit and learn together. Some days she just wants to do her own thing most of the day, and I let her. Some days she loves sitting and reading books with me and other days she is just too busy and I let it be. On days where she just wants to play, I pull out her abc cards and she tells me what all the objects are on the cards. She isn't terribly interested yet in what the letters are unless she can sing the abc's with me. She actually can almost sing the whole song with some mumbling in between. I also find that I have to pick the right timing but she loves it when I sit down with her and we go over her colors with uno cards or we read together or whatever it may be. But I definitely admire you for what you do and I am striving to be more learning oriented in our house cause I think it's important too. :)
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